Hark the Starbucks Christmas Blend

There are two things I love this time of year.

Much the same stuff, which I like all year round, I like food and new promotions. Christmas, in all it's ho-ho-ho, is awesome. I don't care much for family gatherings (except those that involve my Dino's cooking and my mom laughing) but I do love how various restaurants and shops have promotions and sales like it was going out of style - and it always seem extra cheap this time of year to get drunk, too.

And this year, my favourite restaurant promotion is Starbuck's Christmas Blend brewed coffee. It is a work of Barista art, and can only come from the bowels of the world's most resilient coffee chain - STARBUCKs.

And I get 20% off la, since I work with ______ mah. (sorry la, confidential mah)

For roughly 8 bucks a grande cup, it isn't cheap. But it IS the most awesomest cuppa coffee I ever had - stronger than an Americano, sweeter than an Expresso, richer than a Double Expresso, and ever so much tastier than the crap produced in Nescafe machines. I have no problem with Nescafe, by the way, but let's face it: it IS crap.

But you won't hear me knocking it, coz its caffeine and I LOVE CAFFEINE.

So in tribute to one of my fav celebrations and the GLORY THAT IS THE NEWLY BORN Starbucks Cup O' Christmas Blend. (you tot I would say Jesus, didn't u? didn't u?? HAH!)

Ahem.

So here goes:

Starbucks Night

Starbucks Blend,
Christmas Blend,
All is nice,
All is hot.
Round yon' Venti and Grande and Tall,
Holy Christmas, it's thirty-percent off,
Sip in heavenly peace,
Sip in heavenly peace.

Hark the Starbucks XMas Blend

Hark the Starbucks Christmas Blend,
Glory to the Venti Cup,
Piece of cake, behold it comes,
Offspring of a Baker's touch,
Strong they make the coffee taste,
Packs a punch when much in haste,
With th'angelic hosts proclaim,
Cups are born in Starbucksland,
Hark the Starbucks Christmas Blend,
Glory to the Venti Cup.


We Three Cups

We three cups of Starbucks are,
Bearing beans we traversed afar,
Steam and presses, cream and sugar,
following yonder (bari)star.

O cup of wonder, cup of life,
Shine with fragrant coffee bright,
Westward-leading still proceeding
Guide us to thy perfect light.

Rudolph the Caffeined Reindeer

Rudolph the Caffeined Reindeer,
Had some very tired eyes,
And if you ever saw him,
you would even say it blows.

All of the other reindeers,
used to laugh and call him lame,
They never let poor Rudolph,
Join in any drinking games.

Then one groggy Christmas Eve,
Santa said to him,
Rudolph with your eyes so sore,
You can raid my coffee-store!

Then all of the reindeer loved him,
As they shouted out COFFEE,
Rudolph the Caffeined Reindeer,
you'll go down in history!

There are two conclusions in which you can draw.

First, I am stark raving mad.

Second, you feel the urge to call Starbucks to have them hire me.

Go fo the second. Thanks. Ciaaooo.

(UPDATE: Upon insistence by V-dearest, I TRADEMARK these songs. They belong to Pauline, also known fondly as Whales, and they were written while under the influence of a dangerous new drug called Starbucks Christmas Blend)