The Dark Knight and The Dark Night

I think I have reached levels of frenzy that I've never reached before for a movie.

I love movies.

(Yes, and my mom's a woman, shall we move on?)

Stating the obvious aside, I am a movie-buff of rather impressive proportions, and I enjoy (good) movies the way an alcoholic enjoys his 235th bottle of vodka: I am intoxicated by the acting, the plot, the images of fictional (and sometimes non-fictional) stories played out by people I will probably never see off-screen in my entire life.

I am serious about going to cinemas, I am fussy about movie buddies and there is nothing quite like a good chew on the movie afterward. Unless of course, the movie was good but *shrug* then oh well.

A great movie, now, THAT is one I have been waiting for some time.

I have seen movies that were really really good, but I want THAT movie.

THAT one great movie. The one that will move me, shake me, and make me remember every scene although years afterward.

I have seen a few in my lifetime; movies that seriously hit me hard. Shawshank Redemption. Then came those that were just plain epic. LOTR. Then the ones that made me sigh and smile. Bridget Jones's Diary.

So many more, and too many to list.

I haven't seen a GREAT movie lately, and I have hopes for The Dark Knight so high, if it is microscopically less than what I am expecting, I shall seriously kill someone.

I want to watch an epic, fantastic movie again.

Call me crazy, but there is nothing quite like the way an excellent movie makes you feel its aftershocks for years later. No words to describe the way a truly great film makes me feel.

I am crazy, aren't I? But seriously, I am so looking forward to the Dark Knight it isn't even real.

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My nights are darker than usual lately.

Is it because I toss and turn and think of how much work I have and how little I want to do it?

Or is it because my mind is occupied with things not meant to be, and never shall be realized?

Perhaps it is just that my thoughts tend to veer towards paranoia, when my lights are off and the silence is barely broken by the hum of my fan and the slight murmur from my laptop. Paranoia of such extreme forms I shudder to think what would happen if one day they take over my mind and drive me stark raving mad.

Exhaustion with the way that I take hours just to fall alseep.

The nights are getting darker. I sleep less well, and although Ms. PL would say 'can we sleep at night' if we're guilty about something, then perhaps I AM guilty of something.

Guilty of overthinking. Guilty of being paranoid, and worrying about nothing, and longing for something: I don't know what it is, but I want it. I want something. I need this something.

Yes, dark nights. Perhaps if I just think less. Or don't think at all. It seems to work for some people. It doesnt work for me, though.

I think. And I think and I think of things just so ridiculous that if you heard my thoughts you'd smack me.


I need to get to work.

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