We interrupt your usual broadcast of the Idiocy and Lunacy of The Whale to bring to you this latest news: Her house (read: porch and a little bit in the living room) was flooded.

It began with a heavy downpour such as had never been seen for the past, erm, few days. It was as if the sky had been torn open like a pack of chips to bestow upon us its tears. (Or maybe it was just the huge gaping holes in the ozone, and not really the sky crying or anything.) The rumbles of its dissent shook my tiny little house and totally killed my Astro. Its bright flashes beamed across the infinite expanse of air and smog and KL pollution.

It rained and rained and I was stuck with nothing to do except take a wild shot at sleeping when my body was completely and utterly shot through with caffeine. I could not shut my eyes; I could not shake off the unease in my heart that comes with every heavy downpour (after the last flood, circa 2002, which was knee-deep and saw our furniture floating away and my dog nearly drowned, I have always feared heavy rains). That, and because I was caffeinated. But I continued to toss, and turn and tried taking slow breaths and thinking of ways to deep-fry prawns in batter to finally achieve bliss of sleep.

Then I heard my mother's panicked calling of my name (man, the last time I heard my mom call me like that was when I didnt pick up her phone call on my first day in Uni) and I rolled out of bed lazily until she said "HOUSE FLOODING!!!" Then boy, I shot down the stairs (narrowly escaping tripping and falling and breaking my neck and drowning in 3 inches of flood water, ew, not a nice way to meet my Maker) and surveyed the situation. Ok. Porch half-flooded, living room safe, mom in a frenzy (oh damn) and Maya outside, appearently still safe.

Mom was panicking and trying to save our electronics, fearful that the water will rise and totally demolish our precious audio system and our only source of entertainment, the TV. But because we have TWO men in the house, (as is to be expected, none of them were home, one working, the other fishing, guess which one is doing what) the wires attached to said electronics sure were 1) complicated, 2) messy, 3) beyond our female comprehension.

I was more concerned with the 6th member of my family, my silly little Maya, who was hiding in her kennel, absolutely terrified. I rushed out and quickly grabbed her leash. I had to coax her out of her kennel and then I tied her to the treadmill at the back of our house; while my mom yelled "forget the dog, help me with the wires!" But my thoughts were only on my dog, seriously, I mean, hello? Dog lover extraordinaire here! Screw the elctronics! Save dog! Even if dog is in no danger!

*Okay, I am a total gloser. Meaning geek+loser. Gloser. Pronounced Gloo-ser. I intend on making it a trademark.*

And, to my eternal shame (and thus further proving that I am a girl) the next thing I saved were my mom's Hush Puppies. Erm, hello? Those shoes cost a bloody bomb. The next thing I did was to shut the glass/wood front door (my front door comprising of one fully paneled glass and wood door and then grills) and thus, I managed to stem most of the water that was taking over my porch. Then I called my trusty big bro, who rushed home.

Alas, the water leaked into our living room. Just a little, but enough to ruin the carpet and soil the floor length curtains (which I now have to wash). Luckily, the water did not ontinue to rise, and overall, we escaped pretty much unscathed, compared to my next door neighbour, whose entire living room got muddified.

Then began the cleaning (which took about 3 solid hours) under the pelting rain. The cause of the flood was traced to a small landslide near my area, where some greedy, shortsighted and stupid developers had built a stretch of houses, despite the geographical inappropriety.

What was funny was earlier that day, I rode the LRT with me folks (yes, including my dad, pfffftt) to Pasar Seni. My dad's first on the LRT. He looked about as comfortable as me in 3 inch heels. (Not that I will ever wear 3 inch heels, but if I ever do, I'd be most uncomfortable.) Though after a while, he was (oh my) enjoying himself. Pffft. Mom was home 'cause she took leave, luckily, or I would be all alone at home and then that would have been disastrous.

Ah, but now everything is alright, we'll have mud everywhere for the next few days I reckon. Garn. There goes my new shoes. I am SO not wearing them out.